Almost 10 years ago I got pregnant at the age of 15 by a man who was 21, I am 25 now. When I got pregnant, my mother kicked me out and he supported me. He was very controlling and physically abusive. After 5 years, and 6 months after the birth of our son, after an especially violent episode I filed assault charges against him and got a 2-year protective order. I have now been happily married for 4 years. My ex rarely sees the children(5 times in total), and when he does he mostly ignores our son. He has never paid anything or even given a birthday gift, despite him showing up unannounced to our daughter's birthday party 2 years ago. I went through counseling and have realized that what happened to me wasn't my fault. I'm wondering if I could/should file charges on him for statutory rape? Looking back on the situation, he took advantage of me and the thought of a man of his age pursuing a 14 year old girl (because that's how old I was when we started dating) really disturbs and disgusts me. Also, his cousin recently told a mutual friend who has always been very close to both families that he attempted to touch her inappropriately when she was 11, but she refuses to testify because it would cause problems with her family.

I recently found out that he's engaged to a woman who has a young daughter and if he did something I would feel so guilty if I never did anything to expose him when I had the opportunity.

In addition, his fiance has expressed interest in having the children visit them. We have no custody order, and the Attorney General is currently filing for support against him because I'm receiving state aid. I don't want my daughter to be alone with him. I'm also afraid that if I let them take the kids out of my custody then they wont have to give them back to me unless I file for custody.

Is it too late for me to file for rape? Can I refuse to let the kids go with him? Can he take them and refuse to give them back to me because there's no custody order?

The statute of limitations in TX for this second degree felony is 10 years as the law CURRENTLY stands, however 10 years ago, which is the law that applies (since that's when the crime occurred) the SOL was only7 years, so you're already past the limit for any potential for there to be a case. Even if the case were within the SOL, the state realistically wouldn't consider spending taxpayer dollars to pursue a 10 year old case against someone who, by your own admission, supported you and the child, and with whom you willingly co-habitated for multiple years.


You can certainly contact police, but I wouldn't expect the DA to pick up the case.

Since the state is pursuing him to repay the money that the taxpayers are giving to you, that opens the door for him to seek visitation. If the violent was solely against you, and not against the child, he's likely to be granted visitation. You can attempt to bring up events that occurred between you two, but the courts typically see violence against the partner as a separate issue than violence against the child (as sick as that sounds).

He may start out with supervised visitation, but the legal reality is that he'll eventually get normal visitation, including overnights, weekends, and weeks during summer, UNLESS he's got some criminal conviction of a crime against a child. This is why attempting to pursue such matters is SO vital. Once you let that chance slip away, there's no going back.

You already have custody. Even if dad gets visitation, you'll still have custody. If there is a court order that spells out visitation, and dad violates that order, then you have legal remedies for that through the courts and police. But the courts aren't going to limit his visitation based on what COULD happen, they'll do so if he ACTUALLY violates the court's visitation order.


Yes.

Unless he's got a court order for visitation, you can absolutely tell him "NO".

If you let them go with him, you'll need a copy of the court's order for visitation in order for law enforcement to assist in getting them back if he won't return them. Without that order, if with the children with him, it becomes a "he says, she says" and police will simply check that the children are ok, and will leave the children with him and tell you to get to court to get an order for their return (which could take several weeks and a few thousand dollars for the attorney you'll want to help with the complicated process, because it won't be a "do it yourself" matter). Court orders for visitation protect BOTH sides, by not only setting out the rules, but more importantly by giving law enforcement something TO enforce. If you've got concerns about letting the children go with him, then don't let them go with him until he is granted a visitation order.

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While pointers can be helpful, ultimately the number one lesson in any legal action is: don't take legal advice from books, family, friends, co-workers, police officers, grocery clerks, web sites, or people on legal message boards. The only person who can give YOU legal advice is YOUR attorney.

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I agree with aardvarc. Have you browsed through the information in LawInfo's Free Legal Resource Center to learn more about your issue yet? See: http://www.lawinfo.com/consumer.html and http://resources.lawinfo.com/en/index.html. You can certainly try to speak to a lawyer to determine what legal options may be available. In the meantime, you may be able to learn more on your own. Search the "Free Legal Resources" tab, or browse the Consumer Resources. Good luck.