i just recently got married and my husband and i moved here to live with his family. he has a cousin who is 16 but will soon be 17. the house he lives in is not a good environment. his parents live with our grandmother and basically mooch off of her. his mother doesn't have a job and his father gets paid minimum wage. the house they live in is filthy, no one ever cleans it and it is highly unsanitary. he has a brother and a sister but they are bad eggs. only his parents don't do anything about them and continue to let them do whatever they want (which is alot from stealing hundreds of dollars from them and even sexual assault [long story]). this cousin is the only one in that house with any hope. he's smart, has a love of learning and genually wants to be a good person and go to college, but in that house. he is blamed for everything (even things that couldn't possibly be anyone's falt), he is put down, his father threatens to kick his a**, and he is constantly told he's stupid and can't do anything. if he stays in that house his chances for success are greatly deminished. my husband and i want him to come live with us, but we don't know if his parents will allow that. can they stop us legally?

of course they can. this is THEIR child, and they decide what he can do and who he lives with untill hes 18. if they wont allow him to live with you, then its no. you have no legal standing to do anything where this child is concerned. and if you push the issue, they will have the legal right to cut you off from contact with him. be careful

In Missouri an individual can move and live anywhere they want once they reach age 17. A parent is legally required to provide a home for them until 18, but they cannot stop a child who is 17 from leaving. You don't have to take my word for it, go down to your local police station and ask them.

Please don't advise someone to talk to the police. Police officers are not lawyers and they do NOT know the laws. If you had a toothache, would you go to see a physciatrist for it?
The correct advice would be to tell the poster that a child is a minor until age 18, the parents are in control until that day. If the poster wants to know more, advise them to speak to an attorney.

Isn't it sad that someone would take the effort to join an advice forum just to spew nonsense??

The legal age of majority in most states is 18. There seems to be some confusion about the law regarding what age a person is considered an "adult" for various purposes - moving out, entering into contracts, being tried as an adult in criminal matters, etc. You might find more information at your local family court house regarding whether or not he can live with you without the parent's permission. You can certaintly speak to an attorney as well. You can find more information about an attorney through the attorney locator service on LawInfo's home page at: http://www.lawinfo.com/. Regardless of what happens legally, it sounds like your husband's brother is lucky to have you and your husband in his life. Good luck.

Nothing like a warm welcome. Gabrielle, Bay, your responses aside, I gave my answer to provide a possible avenue of hope to someone who looking for a way for someone to get out of a negative situation. Missouri does not have an clearly defined age of emancipation, the rules differ for various situations. I recommended talking to a police officer so the OP would have easy, free access to confirm my advice rather than simply taking my word for it. While law enforcement officers are an imperfect source, they do study and have responsibility for enforcing the law and thus do have an above-average knowledge in this area.

If you have something more solid to base your belief regarding the law, please feel free to provide specifics. I'll freely admit I don't have a statute or case law handy to quote, however my family did face a situation along these lines just a few months ago. My step-son wished to move to his father's home and after consulting legal counsel we were informed that since he was 17, there was nothing we could legally do to keep him from moving. In fact, we were told that however well-meaning a parent's actions were, they were at risk of kidnapping charges if they forced a 17 y/o to return to their home against the child's wishes. We had reason to be concerned about he environment at the home where my step-son wished to move, but we were advised there was nothing we could do to prevent it.

Kitten14, by all means it is advisable to consult an attorney. Advice from an Internet forum is not sufficient for taking action in something like this without talking to a qualified professional.

BTW Gabrielle, a psychiatrist is an MD who has general medical training and experience before they entered their specialty. If that was the quickest resource I had access to in dire circumstances and they were willing to help, they would be a viable resource to prescribe antibiotics or pain medication to help deal with a toothache until I could find access to a dentist.

Edit: It's obvious it was late when I posted last night, I completely overlooked that both Bay and Gabrielle do not live in Missouri and may not be familiar with the laws specific to this state. Since this is a Missouri forum, I was answering the question with regards to my understanding of the laws here.

I went through a very similar situation a few years ago with my (now former) step daughter. She was 17 and desperately wanted to move in with her dad and I. Her mother threatened that if she attempted to move out she would have a cop come get her and haul her home. Since we didn't know the law and wanted to give our daughter every chance at making an informed decision I took her to the police station and let her ask questions of the officers there.

We were informed, just as Velobard stated, that a child who is 17 can live where they choose. If her mom were to call the cops all they would do was ask our daughter to contact her mother but even then that would only be if they happened to run into her. They would not come pick her up or even come looking for her. I too would say ask the local police department what their policies are.

yes, i would say this is a very common thing that police deal with in every state. besides all that... if you can't post a question and get a lawyer to answer it specifically on here then what's the difference in asking the police or the tooth fairy or whoever you think would be best? my brother is a police officer and believe me they have to know the laws on exactly what they can and can't do with a child through 18. maroni

Did the police also inform the child's father that if he violated the custody order he could be charged with contempt of court? How the police respond to a civil matter isn't always the only legal recourse a parent has. My answers are ALWAYS based on the state in question. Always.
A minor is under the care and control of his/her parents until they reach their majority...If that minor moves out without permission that is running away. I would fight my way up the chain of command until I received help from the police. I would also file a criminal complaint with the police against the party harboring the runaway.

The OP of this thread should have been advised to contact CPS due to the neglect of the child . That is the best option to help the child in question.