I am in the terrible position of trying to take custody of my 4 year old granddaughter.She is the only child of my 23 year old divorced daughter.When my granddaughter was 9 months old her and her mother moved back to my house.My daughter has never been "mother of the year" and the child was never her top priority.I hate speaking bad of my daughter but the truth is the truth.During the nearly 3 years they lived with us-myself,my wife,a 14 year old daughter and 17 year old son-my eldest daughter worked late nights as a bartender and attempted to take some college courses.That left the major rearing up to the rest of us.This includes my parents and in-laws.On the nights my daughter was not working her primary goal was forcing her daughter to bed as early as possible so she could go out drinking with her friends.During the first couple of years she dated several good men who were very good with my granddaughter.The problem was the good catches didn't care for the partying lifestyle and subsequently would break up.I realize you cannot choose a mate for your child but she really let some good men get away.Then she met Kent.In his 40's and loaded with money.She and her daughter eventually moved into the big house.Soon after my granddaughter developed a traumatic fear of returning to his house after visits will anyone in the family.We initially wrote it off as an adjustment the child had to make.This past spring my daughter confided that Kent had been beating her.My wife took photos of the bruises he inflicted.My daughter also revealed her fear of him.The next assault my wife convinced her to have him arrested and come back home.After a few weeks and numerous text messages from him she moved back into his house.My wife and her mother immediately applied to have the child removed.Soon after that the child revealed that he had beat her too.This was evident last Christmas when she had a busted lip that my daughter claimed was an acident.My mother in law got temporary custody after we presented the case including the photos to a family court.All we want is for both of them to be safe.My daughter recently failed to testify against Kent and the assault charges were dropped.She is still not safe and they still live the partying lifestyle.In the nearly 6 months since the court ruling my daughter has spent less than 24 total hours with her child.Another fact in this is that this daughter has been a habitual liar for 10 years.She has convinced the Guardian Et Litem that the family has "brainwashed" her daughter and created a fear of this man.She claims that she is in a safe loving household with this man.We are terrified that the court will place my granddaughter back in that house.My wife is terrified that my granddaughter will be hurt again-not to mention my daughter.This fear is so real that my wife is on nerve medication and still cannot sleep.This fear is in my entire family.Mdaughter has cut off the entire family for the past few months.I failed to mention this man does have a history of harming women.He has alienated our family.We know that my daughter is scared of this guy but loves the rich lifestyle he affords her-even with a few bruises along the way.We want to take custody but do not have sufficient funds to drag it through the courts.What are our chances.What should we do.The only contact I have had with my daughter since March 19 was her misleading us into believing she was trading in her expensive truck,that he gave her,so she could get enough cash to move out.I was ecstatic to help her.Then she got the money,gave it to him and never moved out.She told us,her sister and her daughter she was getting her own place-another big lie.My granddaughter still kicks and screams when we get within 2 blocks of their house.There is so much more to this story.We just want the kid safe in a healthy environment.Thanks for reading this.

Generally speaking, if there is a history of domestic violence (even without a conviction), and you as grandparents have been functionally raising the child, then mom's apparent disinterest in the child coupled with history and willingness of grandparent involvement would be above-average grounds for the court to assign custody.

HOWEVER, the child has ANOTHER parent, and HE may rights that will have to be addressed as well.

__________________
While pointers can be helpful, ultimately the number one lesson in any legal action is: don't take legal advice from books, family, friends, co-workers, police officers, grocery clerks, web sites, or people on legal message boards. The only person who can give YOU legal advice is YOUR attorney.

http://www.aardvarc.org

I agree with aardvarc on this. Have you browsed through the information in LawInfo's Free Legal Resource Center to learn more about your issue yet? See: http://www.lawinfo.com/consumer.html and http://resources.lawinfo.com/en/index.html. You can certainly try to speak to a lawyer to determine what legal options may be available. In the meantime, you may be able to learn more on your own. Search the "Free Legal Resources" tab, or browse the Consumer Resources. Good luck.

My wife and I filed Friday for joint custody with the father.We have a good sharing relationship already.He was there filing behind us.I know my daughter has a lawyer as does my mother-in-law whose temporary custody hearing is Oct 12.She has had custody for 6 months.Now I have to come up with funds to hire my own attorney.They are trying to combine our cases to conserve court time and expense.I guess most of the witnesses in the case will be there anyway.We met with the guardian at litem Friday as she had a scheduled meeting with my in-laws.I am disappointed in the fact that the only people the guardian ad litem has visited are my daughter and my in-laws.It is not fair to the child to only get 2 sides of the story.I hope it helped our case that my wife and I gave her another insight into the behavior of my daughter regarding her lack of open and available visitation of her daughter.The only thing we have prevented her from doing is putting that child in the boyfriends house.My poor daughter is so immature that she told us if we get custody she would at least want the child to be able to spent the night with her at that house.I am sorry but,DUH,that is the only problem we have-NOT IN THAT HOUSE.She just doesn't get it.Well thanks for the interest.Will check back and post an update when I speak to an attorney.I must say that my wife and I are neither sleeping.We are worried sick about the outcome of the case.I really don't know how either of us will react if they let her take the child home.By the way the little buttercups name is LIZ.

I do hope everything works out for the best and please do post an update.

Well I hired an attorney today.During consultation with another attorney was told daughter had previously discussed case with her so was a conflict.I take it as a good sign the lawyer did not accept my daughters case.I feel a little more confident now.Guardian ad litem coming here Monday for home visit and I cannot wait.

GAL's do home visits when there's not much else to BAR the case, so take that as a positive sign!

__________________
While pointers can be helpful, ultimately the number one lesson in any legal action is: don't take legal advice from books, family, friends, co-workers, police officers, grocery clerks, web sites, or people on legal message boards. The only person who can give YOU legal advice is YOUR attorney.

http://www.aardvarc.org

That sounds great.

Spent 6.5 hours at courtroom paying attorney $240 an hour not including all the prep hours paid.GAL was a no show.Tied up in court in another city.Case continued for 6 months and no changes made regarding custody.The GAL is the most important person to the case and does not make the court date.My faith in the justice system has hit rock bottom.She should be held in contempt.There were 3 attorneys getting paid yesterday waiting for her plus my daughters attorney.Wiped out 2 weeks of my pay for nothing.Thanks jurisprudence.This money would have gone a long way towards the care of my granddaughter.Now all my bills will be late and not a bloody good thing to show for it.We don't spend that much for a family vacation.Who can I sue to get my money back?

I am sorry that happened. Your attorney will be the best one to ask regarding who you can ask for your attorneys fees from.